What bugs you in the middle of the night? I’m up in the wee hours almost every night. This has nothing to do with the bebe as he’s usually snoring away happily in his crib. I’ve noticed everything seems worse at this time. Worries and doubts creep up and the irrational fears set in. Usually by morning I can laugh at myself for being such a worry wart. However, there is one fear that doesn’t seem to be fading at dawn. This irrational fear of getting in a wreck with Hayden in the car.
This fear has been growing for the past several months. It’s not paralyzing by any means – it doesn’t keep me from going places – and I’ve noticed it doesn’t seem to bother me when I’m a passenger. But I do feel like I’m a much more cautious driver than I was previously and I’m much more aware of how other people are driving.
Yesterday my sister and I were walking in her neighborhood with the babies and a man driving a white pickup truck erratically almost hit us head on. To clarify: the main streets in her neighborhood are the width of three streets and we were hugging the left curb. Honestly, this guy was swerving all over the place and almost hit a vehicle after he passed us. I wish I’d had the wits about me to write down his plate number and now I feel like walking with an air horn for any future crazy-driving incidents. I also drive through three school zones on the way to daycare and I am continually amazed at people who don’t heed traffic signals. Over the past year I’ve almost been plowed into walking through crosswalks (the most disturbing in front of a store while I was pregnant), parking lots, and most notably the incident yesterday with my sister.
I know many of you out there have children. One, two, more than two. (Bless you.) And some of you may have none. Everyone tells me to get ready for this parenting ride because it has its ups and downs. I know you can’t control other people, only your reactions to them. So how do you deal with a fear of other people harming your child because they are careless? Stop leaving the house? Start practicing yoga? Get a great therapist?
When does a phobia take on a life of its own? And how do you conquer it? I appreciate your insights!